During my adolescence I made friends easily. It’s a gift I was thankful for; my dad was in the Army and we moved a lot. My mom would encourage my quest to befriend people within the community. I’d introduce myself, invite potential friends over to my house and meet up at the local playground (as kids did in the 90s). As I got older the ability to make friends become challenging. Nothing monumental, just different. Some of my friends got married, I joined the Army and eventually moved away. My time in the Army was exciting, challenging and enlightening. I eventually became a mom and an Army spouse. Undoubtedly I was living with rose colored glasses on! Making friends became harder. I now had to consider something I thought I had an endless supply of…..time. It’s a resource that is confined to 24 hours per day and 7 days per week.

I no longer had the time to chat for hours, invite friends over and live the carefree lifestyle I was so accustomed to. Over time, I have cultivated some amazing ways to make new friends while staying in touch with my OG’s.

Smiles Are Contagious:

volunteer: As long as I can remember, my mom was always volunteering with an organization. I feel that volunteering is the quickest way to make friends within the community. I’ve counted tithes at church, been a room mom in the elementary schools, worked at Red Cross, became a PTO board member, among others.
social media: I know it sounds scary and weird, but I have made so many friends on social media! There are so many platforms available and different groups, pages or you can go your own way and start chatting to someone you connect with. The possibilities are endless! You can find someone who is at a duty station you are currently at or one you are in the process of moving to. You can get so many fantastic ideas from those who have lived in the location.
learn something new: I am always learning something new. A recipe, craft or even the history of the city. I believe it’s my duty to explore the local community. I’ve learned how to make the best pastry’s, the cutest wreaths, and walked the famous Civil Rights landmarks of Alabama. Being grateful for the opportunity to learn something new is so special and important. It’s easy to feel defeated and to give up. Use this opportunity to do something new that is unique to your community. My next activity is to learn how to make Carolina BBQ.
empathy: connecting with individuals beyond my peer group is an additional joy I recently added to my toolkit. I decided to participate in activities primarily with members from older generations than mine through the local YMCA. The conversations have been interesting and thought provoking. Being able to converse with the seasoned and diverse community members has allowed me to participate in activities I would have avoided and gain new perspectives.

Having confidence in myself and seeking joy has been the foundation of my success. I hope to encourage others to participate in community activities and to relish in the opportunities afforded to them. Thanks for reading and be sure to follow me @sincerely.schwartz on Instagram.